Definitions
contradiction \kon·truh·’dik·shun\ n: 1. An employed liberal.
disillusionment \dis·il·’ü·zshun·mint\ n: 1. The time period between one’s student years and actually securing gainful employment. 2. The moment when a young, newly-employed liberal (see contradiction) discovers that Welfare recipients have a higher standard of living than they do.
green energy \grēn ‘en·ur·jē\ n: 1. The precise combination of feasibilium, unobtanium, and taxpayer money which, when accomplished, will supplant all other traditional energy sources. 2. Traditional feed for unicorns.
liberalism \’lib·ur·uhl·izm\ n: 1. A form of mental retardation manifested in the uncanny inability to learn from the painful mistakes of myriad societies that have gone before. 2: The desire to steal from a productive member of society in order to give to one who refuses to be productive because of unsubstantiated disadvantages rooted in stereotypes promulgated by liberals to ensure their perpetuity. 3: Inability to be retained in gainful employment. 4: Psychological fear of a healthy, functioning economy. 5: modern US – Journalism.
Touré’s syndrome \ˈtü·rāz ‘sin·drōm\ n: 1. A neurological disorder characterized by angry eyebrows and delusions of adequacy. Often accompanied by the compulsive characterization of every occurrence as being racially motivated. 2. A mild form of mental retardation manifested by believing the sensational vociferations uttered during one’s or another’s fit of Touré’s Syndrome.
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